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December 2016

Adoption
Forever Ours! And Our Letter to The Boys’ Birth Mom
December 19, 2016 at 10:34 pm 1
15541409_10105725927497241_5661743435355020599_n The boys are ours!!! We finalized our adoption of Henry and Jack today! Happy adoption day, my boys! I can't begin to express how awesome it feels to know they're really really really ours. They've been our sons since we first met them in August, but having a judge tell us that they are as legally ours as Clara is just makes us feel so at ease. And no more social workers or home studies or adoption lawyers or paperwork! (Although we have the best social worker and adoption lawyer!)  Adoption is a lifelong journey, but this part is OVER! 🙌🏼

This morning I finally sat down to write in the card I bought our boys' birth mom when the process first began. It's customary to give your child's birth mom a note and small gift when the child is placed with you; our open adoption relationship hasn't been textbook, so we did it today!

Since we were matched with the boys through a private attorney, she never got to see our profile book. Funny story, it actually came in the mail the day we got the news that we were chosen!

In addition to our book (so she could learn more about our family, where we live, what we do), we had a pendant made for her with the boys' birth date and an infinity symbol, and a small keepsake box. We also included our card, tons of photos of the boys (with descriptions written on the back) and an update letter with the boys' weight, milestones and other fun things.

Before writing the letter, I did some Googling for inspiration on what adoptive parents have written their children's' brith mothers/parents. I found nothing! I wanted to share what I wrote to her in case any other adoptive parents need inspiration for pulling together all those emotions and feelings of thanks into a few sentences!

Dear ____,

We are forever connected, and forever grateful to you, for you chose us to parent these two perfect baby boys you grew right under your heart. Thanks will never be enough. Instead, we hope that you feel security and joy that Henry and Jack are forever loved and cared for, and that they will always know you and the selfless choice you made for them. We couldn’t possibly love these boys more!

With lots of love, Richard and Ashley

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